Is every job a sales job? Is motherhood the antidote to burnout?

Per My Last Email: Anonymous questions about work, life, and everything in between

Do you need to get it off your “desk”? Enter: Per My Last Email, an anonymous series where we’re getting the real deal on how women feel about their careers—the frustrating struggles, the joyful moments, and everything in-between. Whether you’re looking for real advice or just validation that we’re possibly all going through it right now, find their responses below.

How old are you?

30

Where are you located?

Chicago

What is your job?

Strategic Communications Consulting

What is your yearly income?

$155,000 + 15-20% bonus

What is your relationship status?

Engaged

Do you have any children?

No

Did you attend college?

Yes - BAs in Sociology and English and MS in Management Studies

If yes, are you currently using the degree you went to school for?

Yes, I am. I am using my 2 year college diploma.

What did you want to be when you were a kid?

I wanted to live in NYC with one of those glamorous, creative jobs you see in rom-coms - fashion writer, advertising executive, etc.

What do you think your younger self would think of you today?

On the surface she'd be impressed - senior level in a corporate job, I live and work in a city (not NYC though), I go out for cocktails with friends, I buy nice clothes when I want - but I think she'd be confused and bummed if we had a conversation and she saw how unhappy I am with my job, which is what we had been working towards in school.

Do you love your work?

No. And if I'm being honest, I'm struggling to imagine loving doing any type of work, which I think means I'm burnt out. I have had a very clear and linear career to date, so this is a huge potential inflection point for me - and I'm not sure what to do.

Do you think you should love your work?

Ideally, of course! You should gain energy from and find value in the things that you do - especially when it takes up the majority of your time for 40+ years. Realistically, as long as you're getting more than you're giving up, that can sometimes be enough - and you can find other places to fill your cup.

What is your work-life balance like?

Poor and sporadic. I work 60-80 hours a week, so most evenings and weekends, and the expectation is that you're never more than a Teams ping away, unless you've previously communicated a conflict - whether that's a Tuesday dinner, a Saturday workout class, or travel / vacation. It sometimes takes more energy to cover off and ensure things run smoothly at work while you're gone than to just work through a vacation or personal commitment.

What is one thing you had to learn the hard way?

Every job at some level or in some way is sales. Whether you're directly responsible for revenue targets for your company's product or your team's work, or you need to sell your expertise and position in order to get work, it's important to know what you can offer, what your potential customer needs, and how to tell a compelling story to win it.

What is something you wish you'd known early in your career?

No one likes networking, it *is* actually important to do it, and when you're at a work event or program, everyone is there to network - it's not awkward to do it! It's easiest to see results from networking when you add process and consistency. And, making friends and staying in touch more casually when you're junior will have an actual payoff when you're more senior - build your network as you grow.

What is one piece of advice every woman needs to hear?

Stand up for your role and what you should and want to do - don't get delegated to being the note taker, the party planner, or the meeting organizer just because you're the woman on the team. It might be an unconscious bias, but it happens more often than not.

Also - a dash of lipstick before an important call or meeting does make you feel more confident!

What's one thing you're struggling with? (at work or otherwise)

I just got promoted to a role I wasn't sure I wanted, and it's been the hardest two months of my career. I'm not excited about my new responsibilities and I know I'm not excelling - which, as a perfectionist and an achiever, is making me feel even worse. I've only worked at this one company and I'm nervous to make a change - what if I take a leap and it doesn't work out? Or what if it does work out, but I still hate working?

What's one thing bringing you joy? (at work or otherwise)

At work, I am seeing one of my direct reports truly come into her own - she has been absolutely crushing it this year! It took a while to get her here, but it's giving me so much joy to see her do a great job and have others recognize her work. I'm so proud - it's everything we want as coaches to see our direct reports succeed.

Is there anything else you want to get off your chest/desk?

My fiancé and I are starting to discuss having kids, and while I don't know if I'm ready for kids just yet (though I do think I want them eventually), it would be a good way to get a break from my job during maternity leave. I'm feeling like the time away could help me figure out my next professional step - whether to stay in the same job, look for a new one, or even consider being a stay at home mom. Is this a crazy thought?

Have something you want to get off your desk? Answer this anonymous questionnaire to be included in a future edition of Per My Last Email: